Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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