I heard we made out
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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