everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
