Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize