are you still at the devil's house?
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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