I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize