He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
50% drunk capacity currently
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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