I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
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i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize