I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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