Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
How external is "for external use only"?
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.