no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Randomize