My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Randomize
