Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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