He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
