and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
You can't just leave with hair like that
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
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