you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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