ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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