worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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