Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
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