he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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