A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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