So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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