"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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