A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
