Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
