Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
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