His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I look better un-naked...
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Thank you for not boning my boss.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
