have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
