I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
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