Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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