even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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