i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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