I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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