if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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