Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
