i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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