too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
