at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
so much tequila, so little girl.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
