Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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