Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Terrible idea I love it
Randomize
