He disabled his match.com account in front of me
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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