Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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