How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
the day after is always just damage control
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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