I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
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to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
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My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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