so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
We left the knife in your bed.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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