So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
