just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Randomize
