I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
