i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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