I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Randomize
