i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
It's blow job season.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
